How Do I Explain Negative Topics On TV To My Kids?

Dear Martha:

I live in Houston and I need advice on how to deal with what is happening with my daughters, ages six, three, and two. One day while we were watching the news, a report about a baby girl who had been abandoned in a garbage can came on and my children saw it by accident.

I don’t know if I made a mistake by letting them see the story, but it was early in the afternoon and I was unable to avoid it. Now my daugters constantly ask me why anyone would throw their children away like that. I don’t know what to say to them and I feel very confused. What can I tell them?

— Concerned and Caring Mother

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Dear Concerned and Caring Mother:

Unfortunately, adults can’t always keep kids from seeing and hearing about such tragic situations. Many times they will be exposed to harsh images of violence or abuse, which is where parents must intervene and explain what happens in the world as gently as possible.  It must also be said in a way that doesn’t provide too much information.

You could tell them that there are parents out there who aren’t prepared to raise their children and that there are certain people and institutions that will take care of them.  Be sure to mention that it’s wrong to mistreat children or act violently towards them, but if it happens the authorities will intervene. It’s also important to let them know that cases like these are rare.

Eventually, they will see depictions of war or scenes of starving children living in extreme poverty.  Assure them that as their mother, you’re there to protect and care for your daughters and that nothing like that is going to happen to them.  It’s every parent’s desire to shelter their children from pain and sorrow, but in the real world it’s impossible.